"Time to Grind"


      10 years have passed since everything I had worked for was taken from me. I vowed on "Black Friday" I wasn't going to let them take my dream away. I'd be back soon enough even better than before doing bigger things. Instead I spiraled out of control trying to race my way back vision blurred by the rage and crashing to wake up finding myself in the same spot today as that dark day. A decade of life wasted without the progress I wanted that I won't ever get back. A long painful lesson that there are no shortcuts on this road. 


      Maybe it was a lesson I had to learn to truly prepare me for what lies ahead. That's something only time will tell. Now that my vision has cleared allowing me to be focused again it's time to take the journey. This road I see in front of me has changed a lot since 2011. I spent the past few weeks really trying to decide how to navigate this.


      I started the original journey down this road in 2004 playing limit hold'em cash games and no limit Hold'em tournaments. By the time 2011 rolled around I was venturing into sessions of limit cash games as high as $100/$200 stakes in "Ivey's Room" on a site called FullTilt Poker. Games weren't hard to find back then. Today it seems to be a dying game with only higher stake games running with regularity. Most sites don't even offer it anymore.


      This means to start my journey I must transition to no limit cash where more players are playing these days. I don't have the bankroll I once had suitable for playing the higher stakes from the start. With this being my final run I have to really manage my bankroll to ensure I maximize my opportunity to be successful long term. That of course means starting with micro stakes and grinding my way up. In terms of no limit cash this will be my first time making it part of my regular play as I only dabbled in it here and there previously.


      I have given myself a bankroll on paper of $5,000 to begin this final journey with. By on paper I mean I don't currently have that in actual bankroll as of this moment, but it is the number I will stick with in terms of loss limit. This is why I am starting the risk of losing it low by only allocating $200 of it for play right now at 2NL cash games.This equals 100 max buy ins at this stake, and that is considered an ultra conservative approach.


      I understand this is going to be a grind playing so low, but right now is not about making big wins. It's about making a successful transition from limit games. It will allow for a large hand sample with lots of play to analyze my game and perfect it. Right now is more about making progress in this area and gaining confidence at the nl tables than anything else.Many pros say that a decent player should almost never go broke with a 100 buy in bankroll, so that is another reason I will use this formula for bankroll management.


     I will be starting the grind today ahead of schedule. Due to certain things being delayed I was expecting the possibility it might have been May before I got to start on this story. That unexpected delay is the reason there was a big delay between the intro post and this first entry. Sometimes good things happen when you just accept things for what they are and keep doing the work on your dreams you can for the moment.


      I was contacted over the past couple weeks by some people in the poker community wanting to stake me in MTTs. Each of them talked about my passion for the game,work ethic, and or watching me play being reason they wanted to back me for some games. It made me feel really good to know that other people see the hard work and how bad I want this. I've had some soul crushing moments over the past year, but thanks to their belief in me the past 2 weeks saw me reach 4 final tables with multiple top 20 finishes outside of those. Safe to say MTTs will remain a part of my journey going forward.


      Those runs restored a confidence that was dying inside of me. I literally had just decided I would eliminate MTTs from my early play when the first person messaged me. I made my first 2 MTT final tables in a year that night. In the days following I was contacted by others, and it felt good to be sought out instead of seeking like previous times. I have a lot of appreciation for them and the early start the opportunity they gave has given me. It's something that won't go forgotten should I reach my dreams in Vegas or not.


      Outside of that I feel very honored to have been given invitation to study and discuss poker with some current professional players in their private discord group. I've long wanted to improve the study aspect of my game, and this is a huge opportunity to do that where private paid coaching  is too high for my current price range. For the first time in a long while it feels like everything is coming together to give me a real chance to get back as long as I stay the course. It's time to stop waiting for the perfect moment and to start grinding. From this moment everything going forward counts, so let's hunt. I'll post next entry on Friday to recap the action on this first stage of the journey.


https://youtu.be/3tgzv2Tk_74 (Virtual Soundtrack)














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